I am beginning to see the woman I want to be. I am beginning to get a much clearer picture of what she looks like and I do know one thing for a fact it is not what she used to look like. I do not want to be her anymore.It is cowardly compared to the woman I want to be. Its highs do not get me high anymore. A woman of integrity, fairness, justice, modesty, and compassion does not act the way she would. She would cower in fear afraid to face the light, afraid to let love in. Today, I can strive to be selfless rather that selfish. I must be if there shall be honor. I will learn to stop latching so tightly onto people as she had. For people could never be controlled and she nearly drove herself mad trying to. A true warrior lets people be exactly what they are, is courageous, and forgiving. I have been reflecting a lot this past week and have had many revelations. It has been a bizarre state that I have been in but I have tried to embrace it. Tonight, I may feel pain for the woman I once was and fear for the woman I want to be but I am embracing it. I am accepting the responsibility of being myself. A responsibility the universe has asked of me. Tonight it feels at a cost but tomorrow I can hope that I will be living with integrity for the choices I have made instead of running to another distraction, running from myself.

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